January 10th, 2006

  • andi_83

Honk if...

In response to the tacky bumper stickers "Honk if you SACKED Brodie"


1. Honk if you won 10 games this season.

2. Honk if you sat with four fingers up your butt for six weeks, while sporting your @#$%-eating grin, instead of making a game plan for your bowl game.

3. Honk if you embarrassed your conference by getting dominated by a slow Big Ten team with three losses.

4. Honk if your team didn't give up over 400 yards of offense in a game the entire season: honk twice if you gave up more than 500 to a middle of the pack offense.

5. Honk if you won 10 games and finished in the top 10 with eight fewer scholarship players than everyone else, and without your #1 playmaker and #1 offensive lineman for the season.

6. Honk if you view a 10 win season as meeting expectations, and you will not organize a parade and order rings to celebrate it.

7. Honk if in your program's worst hour you still have managed to have two ten win seasons during the four year stretch.

8. Honk if your coach acts as if he has won before after achieving success.

9. Honk if you've been to 53 bowl games (NCAA record), and won 30 of them (also an NCAA record).

10. Honk if you've had 28, 10-win seasons (yet another NCAA record).

11. Honk if you're still Auburn.